Thursday, September 1, 2011

I Haz A Fall

Yay! Let's ring in September with post #300!

1. I am ready for Mad Men to come back. I've had to push gender stereotypes and verbally abuse my inferiors on my own to make up for it, and my friends and co-workers are starting to get grumpy. Especially the inferior ones.

2. I was never a huge fan of webcomics. They tend to be pretentious and I have found very few that both have storylines and also are consistently funny. (As much as I find today's syndicated comics trite and at best blandly amusing, it at least has the benefit of quality control.) The better ones tend to be the self-contained one-off panels. And so, if you've never seen them, I can recommend the popular xkcd, The Oatmeal, Hyperbole and a Half, Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal, and (my current favorite) Hark, A Vagrant! Like most things they are hit or miss--and sometimes post erratically--but still are some of the best I've found. If anyone has any good suggestions, by all means let me know.

3. Man, both the 5.9 earthquake and Hurricane Irene turned out to be huge busts. 2012 needs to get here and show us how shit gets done.

4. It's time for Fantasy Football! I will do what I do every year: let the system auto pick everyone, then more or less ignore it until the week before it's over, keeping players on the roster well after it has been confirmed they no longer have functional limbs. Basically: I don't know what I'm doing. (I am many things in this life, but one of those things is not caring who, or how good, the third-string cornerback for the Washington Redskins is.)

5. It's almost fall, which means it's pumpkin time! Once again I will be on the lookout for Pumpkin Pie Pop Tarts. True, I still have nearly all of the boxes still unopened from the great Big Lots raid of 2011, but at this point I'm afraid their quality is quite suspect.

6. You know that whole joke about gingers not having souls? It's stupid, it's getting old, and we can all stop now.

7. I've never considered myself a proper grammar Nazi--everyone makes mistakes, including me, and there are plenty of easy ones to make with our imperfect language--but I always had a knee-jerk corrective reaction (that, thankfully, I often did not verbalize) when I saw someone else make a mistake. I think I may actually be letting go of that particular annoyance. Part of it is seeing how people with such a low grasp of grammar and style succeed monetarily, and I realize exactly how little grammar, spelling, and formatting really matter. And part of it is the fact that so many true-blue grammar Nazis just piss me off with their self-righteous pretentiousness. I don't ever want to be that person.

8. I know that it's blatantly obvious at this point, but the fact that I was able to get more information about last week's earthquake and hurricane from Twitter instead of the old-school television set or (so help us all) radio is an astounding thing that I don't think society has quite come to grips over.

9. I think that this blog needs a mascot, and that mascot is going to be a new character I will artfully name Pimpin' Abe Lincoln. Just think of the marketing possibilities.

10. So, you know how Saturday Night Live kinda sucks? How they will have one character or skit that is legitimately amusing and clever, then they will beat the hell out of that dead horse for six seasons until all the life and energy that went into whatever made it creative is a mere embarrassing husk of itself? And that, at any given time, there are about 45 minutes worth of such sketches every episode? Well, that is what Lady Gaga is at this point.

No comments:

Post a Comment